Fallen Angel

Like a fallen angel am I
Unloved and unwanted
Distressed and disturbed of heart
Unable to die and too pained to live.

I exist like the walking dead
In the realm of the living
Waiting for that elusive grace
For that unknown act of faith
To lead me to deliverance.

I try so hard
To emulate those I envy
To be all that they are
To be adored like them
But I am my own stymie
Forever trapped within unfounded fears
A victim of my own complexes
They drive me to solitude
To exist like a friendless recluse

The energies must not be dissipated thus
In the contemplation of irrelevant issues
- So says the world
But only my heart knows and my mind recognizes
The relevance of lost battles
To the happy existence of my person.

Not the son of the Devil am I
Nor the son of God
I am Lucifer himself
And I ride the steed called Death!